All About Eve - The Original Frenemy

Movie: All About Eve

Rating: 4 stars

 This is a classic movie about what a rough life show biz is.  It’s about how you can never rest on your laurels as a working actor—about how there’s always someone younger and hungrier out there just waiting to steal your place in the spotlight.  But, I think there’s a bit more to this story than that.  It isn’t presented as a simple cautionary tale.  There’s a lot more suspense and drama, and stomach sinking revelations.  This movie is almost edited like a horror movie, and that’s why I find it so fascinating.

 This movie is, of course, a Bette Davis classic.  She plays the famed stage actress, Margo Channing.  And, Anne Baxter plays Eve, the innocent, little, backstage fan-girl, who snags the job of Margo’s assistant.  Of course, as the story unfolds we learn that Eve’s intentions are hardly innocent.  She has a sweet face, and demure demeanor, but is secretly a viper, just waiting for Margo to have a moment of weakness in which to strike.  I’ve never quite understood the appeal of a “frenemy” relationship.  I have a really low tolerance for this kind of undermining behavior and passive-aggressive barbs.  And, I don’t really understand why people seem to be willing to tolerate it in a “friend.”  Either two people like each other, and enjoy one another’s company, or they don’t.  Why waste time hanging around someone you secretly kinda hate?  But, there’s a lot about human motivations that will forever remain a mystery to me. 

 Despite all the warped psychology, this is a pretty fun movie.  Bette Davis is always a riot.  I love a willful, snarky, ill-tempered movie star.  And, that’s basically Davis’ brand.  She really commands all the attention in the room.  Anne Baxter’s Eve may be mercenary and conniving, but her character doesn’t hold a candle to Davis’ Margo.  And, I can’t entirely tell whether that’s due to the characters, or the personalities behind them.  Additionally, the movie features a few scenes with Marilyn Monroe before she became a star.  It’s obvious, even with the short amount of screen-time she gets in this film, why Monroe went on to become a really big deal.  She’s quite the attention-grabber.

This movie is all about the ladies.  The male characters might as well not be there.  And, that’s always kinda fun.  Sure, the guys are the focus of a few plot points, but they really just serve as pawns in the power struggle.  Their presence isn’t necessary.  The same narrative points could be made by merely mentioning them.  This movie is a true classic and is definitely worth seeing.  The story is well-crafted.  The editing is creepy and suspenseful.  And, the acting is captivating.  Don’t let the old-timey, black and white nature of the movie keep you away from it.

Solo: A Star Wars Story - I'd Love to Hear Your Thoughts

Movie: Solo: A Star Wars Story

My Rating: 3 stars

 This movie was fun enough.  It’s the story of Han Solo’s famous “Kessel run” of Star Wars lore, and a deeper look into his back story.  And, it was fun to get more insight into some old, Star Wars canon.  We get to see Han meet Chewy and Lando Calrissian.  We learn a biut more about his troublesome relationship with women.  And, this is where he gets his ship.  But, somehow these newer installments feel a bit more like Star Wars drag to me, rather than a natural extension of the franchise.  The Disney film studio is definitely getting the aesthetics right.  Everything looks great, and very authentic.  And, they’re hitting all the right narrative beats.  But something seems to be missing, and I can’t quite put my finger on it.

I know it’s hard to revive much-loved, old film franchises.  It’s impossible to please everyone, because people have a lot of emotional investment in the stories and worlds they create.  And, emotions are a very tricky thing to satisfy.  But, I think some have definitely pulled off the trick successfully.  Of course, opinions differ wildly, but I thought the modern continuation of Blade Runner was pretty true to character.  Alien 3 wasn’t so bad (although admittedly, all the ones that followed it were pretty disappointing).  And, the new Mad Max revival is fantastic.  I suspect that many people feel the way I do about this Han Solo movie, because it wasn’t a box office success.  But, strangely, I haven’t heard many individual people’s opinions on the film.  I don’t know how my Star Wars fan friends felt about this one, and I’m very curious to hear what they have to say.  And, I’m willing to listen to arguments.

There’s no reason not to see this movie.  It’s a fun adventure story.  And, Alden Ehrenreich is actually really good in the lead role.  Emilia Clarke is everywhere these days.  (Not sure if that’s a good thing or not yet).  And of course, Donald Glover is stealing the show as Lando Calrissian. All the lead actors are very charming.  And, it’s always a good time dipping one’s toes back in the Star Wars waters.  I’m not sure I’m being very fair with my criticisms of this film, and I’d love to hear any counter arguments.  Because, I suspect  I’m just falling prey to the same emotional response that’s warping my judgement.

Us - Cryptic, But Interesting

Movie: Us

My Rating: 3 stars

 This movie is Jordan Peele’s next foray into horror films after his last, Get Out.  And, it required a little thought . . . well, a lot of thought, actually.  Us is a very scary movie, and it starts of like a standard home-invasion horror flick.  But, then it gets a little more esoteric and difficult to understand.  In fact, when I got home after seeing this movie, I immediately looked up several different articles explaining what it meant.  And honestly, that helped clear up a lot of my confusion.  After reading a few pieces about all the symbolism I figured out what message the movie was trying to communicate.  And, at that point it made more sense.  But, that shouldn’t have been necessary.

 With that criticism out of the way, I’m free to tell you that I found the movie to be fun, very scary, and unbelievably tense.  It’s a full-on, home-invasion, slasher movie—with the added horror of the psycho killers being physical doubles for the people they are hunting.  The imagery is chilling.  The idea of bumping into a copy of oneself is terrifying on its own.  But, then the clones reveal themselves to be shrieking, speechless husks, carrying chest-stabbing scissors.  The main plot follows all the traditional tropes of the genre without being overly predictable.    It’s the B plot where things get a little tricky.  Apparently, it’s all a big metaphor for the disaster that was the Hands Across America charade in the 80s.  And, that’s the bit that I needed to read up on afterward.  I wouldn’t have guessed that part on my own.  And, I guess the movie illustrates that point well enough once you know what it’s trying to do.  But, I’m not so sure it makes for the most coherent story.  However, I don’t think that’s a reason not to go see it.

Overall, I liked this movie.  The pacing is tense.  And, the acting is terrifying.  And, it’s amazing once you remember that every actor essentially plays two roles—the “good” version, and the very very scary “bad” one.  Of course, I was predisposed to like the film.  I really enjoyed Get Out, so, I was pretty excited to see this next attempt.  And, it has a lot of the same weird quirkiness.  But, it’s a bit more high-concept.  I’ll keep seeing Peele’s movies.  And you should go ahead and see this one too if you’re into horror films.

The Ballad of Buster Scruggs - Bleak Stuff

Movie: The Ballad of Buster Scruggs

My Rating: 5 stars

 This is one of the darkest, most wonderful collection of short stories I’ve seen in a really long time.  I was almost completely shocked by what I was watching, thinking that there was no way a movie studio would have greenlit such a subversive film.  But, then I remembered that it was a Netflix exclusive, and they’ve been known to get behind some pretty unorthodox material.  This is a set of six, dark, short stories—each one more horrible and ghoulish than the last.  All of them are set in the Old West . . . or at least “frontier country.”  And each story has some terrible observation to make about human nature, or about just what a bitch fate can be sometimes.

 I knew absolutely nothing about this movie before sitting down to watch it, so I was really taken by surprise.  I knew it was a Coen Brothers film, and I remembered that they’ve always had a pretty sardonic streak in their work.  But, I don’t think I ever thought of them as being quite this bleak.  But, perhaps I’m looking at this all wrong.  I’m painting the movie as harsh drama, where it really is black comedy.  Sure, it’s comedy that’ll have you shaking a fist at the heavens.  And, it may incite an existential crisis or two.  But, that’s pretty much a weekly occurrence around my place.  And frankly, that’s the kind of movie I like best.  I like the kind of people that like them too.  And, this really is a great film.  There are tons of great actors—it really is an enormous ensemble cast—and they’re all doing a great job.  The sets are impressive, and the cinematography is gorgeous.  The filmmaking captures a lot of the spectacular natural beauty of the frontier that most of the old Western films pretty much ignore—mountain panoramas, beautiful big skies, deep, dark forests, etc.  And, the gorgeous scenery is such a perfect contrast against the twisted stories the film has to tell.  It’s very well done.

I loved this movie.  I’d watch it again, except that the surprise of each story really is half the fun.  I would absolutely recommend it to anybody hearty enough to roll with the ironic gut punches.  This isn’t a movie for sensitive babies.  Because, there really isn’t much reprieve from the dark material.  I’ve been thinking about it ever since I saw it, and I love when a movie can make me do that.  Check it out and let me know which story you liked best.

Double Indemnity - The Grand-Daddy of Noir

Movie: Double Indemnity

My Rating: 3 stars

 I was fun getting to see the movie that essentially got the whole Film Noir trend rolling.  In my head, this type of movie has always been about men in fedoras, smoking cigarettes, fast dames showing off their gams, dim rooms with venetian blinds, and a pretty thin story.  And, this movie checks off all those boxes in order.  But hey, I guess these well-worn movie tropes had to get their start somewhere!  But, the result was that I almost couldn’t watch this movie with a straight face, it was so by the book.  I couldn’t internalize the fact that this was the script that wrote that book.  So, I guess that’s one drawback to coming to these classic movies so late in life.  I’ve been exposed to so much of its progeny, that I almost couldn’t enjoy the original.  But, I’d like to think that I can at least intellectually appreciate the novelty that this movie was in its day.

 This story is a good, old, sexually-charged murder thriller.  A crooked, (fedora-wearing) insurance adjuster (Fred MacMurray), takes up with a mouthy, gam-baring, married dame (Barbara Stanwyck).  And, their plan is to murder her husband for his life insurance money.  Of course, if they can make the death look like a crazy accident, they can trigger the “double indemnity” clause and get twice the dough.  Naturally, they plan this caper while smoking in dim rooms with Venetian blinds pulled.  It’s dark and sexy, and I’m always surprised by how risqué some of these old-timey movies can get.  Of course, movies back then couldn’t make any explicit sexual references.  But, that just means that the screenwriters and directors became masters of innuendo.  Banning something doesn’t get rid of it, it just drives it underground.

 This is a fun movie to watch if you’re interested in cinematic history.  It’s ground zero for the hundreds of copy-cat movies that followed.  And, that’s kind of the reason why I didn’t find it to be wildly entertaining.  The market has become so saturated with all these noir tropes that I couldn’t view this film with fresh eyes.  But, it played an important part in the development of film and storytelling.  So, if you want to learn more about that kind of thing, it’s always best to start with the original.  And, I suppose watching this film will help you spot references made elsewhere.  So, give it a go.

Apocalypse Now Redux - Better Now That I'm Older

Movie: Apocalypse Now Redux

My Rating: 3 stars

 I saw this movie about fifteen years ago (maybe more), and I absolutely hated it.  It had felt like an interminable slog that didn’t really know where it was going.  But, I was significantly younger.   And, I definitely understand the value of waiting to watch something until you’re emotionally ready for it—either in terms of mood and energy level, or emotional maturity.  So, when the Unspooled podcast got to this entry on the AFI top 100 films list, I decided that it was worth my time to give this movie another go.  And, I definitely think it was worth it.  I enjoyed the movie a lot better this time around.  I don’t know if it’s because I’ve matured significantly, or if I understood better what to expect from it.  But, this time around I knew well enough to embrace the tone of chaos and uncertainty.

There’s a lot going on in this movie—so many layers of sociopolitical statements and literary references.  It’s Francis Ford Coppola’s epic drama, fusing the hopelessness and anarchy of the Vietnam War with the horrors and chaos of Conrad’s Heart of Darkness.  Captain Willard (Martin Sheen) is sent on a secret mission to hunt down and kill Colonel Kurtz (Marlon Brando), who has gone utterly insane (both the character and the actor).  The story takes Willard and his crew down the river right through the Vietnam war, and continues deep into Cambodia to find their target.  There’s a lot of message here, and the film is very heavy-handed about it.  The plot features one atrocity after another—sometimes with a hazy dream logic—and shrugs off each one with a sense of detached nihilism and inevitability.  It’s a very depressing view of human nature, and it can really drag you down if you let it.  If you approach this movie in a patient mood, the film is actually quite powerful and impacting.  So, even though you can see many of the narrative “strings,” it’s executed in such a competent way that the film is worthy of respect.

This is an important movie.  The acting is pretty amazing, and the cinematography is otherworldly.  I agree wholeheartedly with its inclusion on the AFI top 100 movies list.  And, I’ve reached a point where I have the patience and inclination to give all these significant films a go.  I mentioned in previous reviews that I’ve actually been quite surprised by how many of the films I’ve genuinely enjoyed.  And, this one was definitely better this second time around.  It’s still not a wildly entertaining flick.  But, it was never intended to be.  And, there’s plenty of black humor alongside the ham-fisted drama, and I always enjoy a bit of that.  I say this one is worthwhile.  But approach it in the right mindset.

Before the Light Takes Us - Black Metal Examined

Movie: Until the Light Takes Us

My Rating: 4 stars

 Black Metal has always had a pretty sinister reputation—most of that, by design.  People have always enjoyed a good amount of pearl-clutching and sotto voce moralizing about things considered “Satanic.”  I never really put much stock in the whole Black Metal = Satanism thing.  But, I never really knew how seriously to take those claims.  So, I decided to go to the definitive documentary about the topic, and the events that caused such media panic.  I am, of course, referring to the murder, suicide, and series of church burnings in Norway that were attributed to the Black Metal movement in the 1990s.

 The public has always loved a good Satanic scare.  I don’t think they really even care that it isn’t really a real thing.  Or, that when musicians do claim to be involved in Satanic rituals these days, it’s thoroughly tongue-in-cheek, and designed to be provocative.  Of course, I don’t want to detract from the experiences of honest, practicing Satanists.  I know they’re out there holding their weird, nude, Gnostic masses, as is their right.  But most of the stuff that the media and the general public consider to be Satanic is really just some teenagers engaging in a little light rebellion, and trying to feel important.  And, I think that’s exactly what the Norwegian Black Metal scene was all about.  It was about disaffected teens rejecting mainstream, middle-class values.  They were abandoning the strict expectations of their Christian upbringings.  They were disavowing capitalism, and the consumerism that goes along with it.  And, for a group of teen boys who wanted to forcefully renounce conformism, getting into a purposefully dark, discordant musical movement (ironically?) provided them with the sense of belonging and power that that they craved.  So, I think the movement was always only about insecurity, not communing with the devil.

I enjoyed this documentary very much.  It mostly focuses on two musicians from the band Darkthrone—Gylve “Fenris” Nagell and Varg Vikernes—with a few snippets from other musicians.  Fenris is still in the music scene, producing tracks, and making appearances.  He gives his interviews for this documentary from a variety of different locations—preening in a photo studio, grinning in his messy bedroom, brooding in a bleak, snowy, Norwegian forest, and feeling uncomfortable at an art gallery.  He’s adorable.  I know that’s probably not the vibe Fenris was going for.  He was probably going for more of a “dark lord” thing.  But, he’s just so cute in is dark little outfits, and tossing his glossy locks (that he clearly takes very good care of).  Of course, the story is completely different with Varg Vikernes.  As the one responsible for the murder and various church burnings that brought down so much media attention, he is giving his interview from prison.  And in contrast to Fenris, he’s clean-cut, in a regular t-shirt.  And, his interview is strangely chipper and candid.  When I started watching the movie, I thought the roles were switched.  I didn’t know too much about this case ahead of time, so at the beginning, I thought Fenris was the one who had committed all the crimes, and that Vikernes was the one giving context by casually chatting about his silly, angsty period.  I was actually pretty shocked when I figured out I had it backward.  That’s good editing for ya.

 I think this documentary will be interesting to anyone interested in different musical or countercultural movements.  There’s a lot of meat here.  It was a vibrant scene with a rich tapestry of practices and norms.  The outfits were pretty fun.  It was wildly misunderstood by the mainstream culture.  And, of course, there’s the whole Satanic murder scandal.  There’s a lot of material to work with here.  And, the documentary covers it pretty well.  But, I do need to strongly warn you that the film includes some VERY disturbing images of a suicide that it just springs on the audience without any warning.  It’s graphic, and very grisly, and the image is honestly going to haunt me for the rest of my days.  So, if that’s something you need to avoid to maintain your sanity, skip this film.  But, I don’t think it’s enough to warn you away from the movie if you’re interested in learning more about the Black Metal scene.  If you’re into that kind of stuff, you’re probably already either desensitized to disturbing images, or have a healthy understanding of why it’s sometimes important to witness tragedy.  I’m glad I watched it.  But, you should rely on your own judgment for yourself.

Generation Wealth - American Excess

Movie: Generation Wealth

My Rating: 4 stars

 This is a really interesting film.  It’s a documentary by Lauren Greenfield investigating what it is about American culture that encourages us to pursue money so single-mindedly.  The documentary already looked pretty interesting on its own, but when I learned that Greenfield was the same director who brought us The Queen of Versailles, I was sold.  That was the film about a time-share mogul, and the hideous mansion his family was building to look just like Versailles.  I enjoyed the perverse humor of that film, watching an ex-beauty queen earnestly giving us a tour of her truly ugly home.  And, I also respected the journalism.  Not only does Lauren Greenfield show viewers the vulgar results of American culture run amok, but she also seeks to uncover the underlying causes.

 This documentary focuses on individuals that Greenfield has been following and photographing over a number of years.  We see the photos she took of her subjects over a decade ago when they were young and flaunting their possessions and physiques.  And, we catch up with these individuals today as they give interviews about their lives back then, and talk about how their motivations have changed over the years.  Greenfield does an amazing job of capturing raw emotion in her prints, whether it be happiness, ambition, or sadness.  Really, a lot of the stories are a little more bitter than sweet.  Much of the film’s tone focuses on individuals’ dogged pursuit of wealth and their confusion as to why they still feel so empty even after acquiring their status symbols.  But fortunately, most of the interview subjects have gained some perspective over time, and understand themselves a lot better now.  This kind of journalism makes the viewer feel a lot of empathy for other people.  (Or, it made me feel that way, at least).  And, as horrified as I was by some of the behavior documented in the film, I really valued the compassion it made me feel for humanity and all its foibles.

I highly recommend this film.  It’s fascinating, and it provides viewers more than just a bit of cheap entertainment.  Of course, it is very entertaining too.  It’s fun to get a peek into the lives of very grand, delusional people (and deluded  people striving to be very grand).  But the film will also get you thinking and examining your life.  That’s always a bonus.

T-Shirt Sale!!

It’s time to clear out my t-shirt stocks to make room for some new designs. So, I’m having a limited time sale on my most popular design—the Zombie Chainsaw tee.

You’ll remember that the image is a mashup up of the chainsaw-weilding, zombie bride from [REC] 3 and the "Suicide King" playing card motif.  You can get this design in Black or Red. Stocks are limited, and I only have a few left in certain sizes. So, hop on over to my Merch Store and see if anything strikes your fancy. I may even throw in a free gift with your purchase. ;)

Singin' in the Rain - Cheez City

Movie: Singin’ in the Rain

My Rating: 3 stars

 I generally don’t go in for super cheesy, campy stuff.  And, that‘s entirely what this movie is made of.  I’ve been enjoying working my way through the AFI top 100 movies list along with the Unspooled podcast.  And I’ve actually been a bit surprised at how much I’ve liked a lot of the movies on there.  I prefer a little bit more cynicism and dark humor in my movies.  And generally, I’ve been pretty surprised by how many old-timey movies include that element.  But, this movie is pretty bright-eyed and earnest about itself.  And, I didn’t like it as much as the general public seems to.

This movie’s about . . . I don’t know . . . dancing and singing?  With a pretty ham-fisted love story wedged in to actually give the musical score a plot?  In fact, I think that’s actually pretty accurate.  I heard that the whole movie was produced as excuse to perform the songs.  And, that’s definitely how it reads.  None of the singing feels very organic.  But, then I may be a bit prejudiced against the cheesiness of musicals, so I may not be the best judge of these things.  But, this film falls into the “movie within a movie” category.  Gene Kelly is a famous silent movie star who’s having a hard time transitioning to the world of “talkies,” because his style of acting feels too hammy with sound.  Debbie Reynolds is a cute, little showgirl(?) with an amazing singing voice.  And, Kelly is sure that singing is the key to making his movies a hit again.  But, Kelly’s acting partner, Jean Hagen (whose performance I kinda love), is determined to get between the two and mess up everything.  More singing.

 I think when it really comes down to it, I didn’t care for the lead actors in this film.  Donald O’Connor is fine.  I enjoyed his goofy charm.  But, I can’t stand Debbie Reynolds’ big, doe-eyed, “who me?” act.  It all feels completely fake to me, and I couldn’t stop rolling my eyes.  Plus, I kept getting the sneaking suspicion that she may be have been a kind of a viper in real life.  And, then there’s Gene Kelly.  Yes, he’s a very talented dancer.  And, he does manage to capture the little humor that’s in the film.  But, when it comes to the whole Gene Kelly/Fred Astaire showdown, I’m definitely on Team Fred.  Astaire seems so sweet, and humble.  Whereas Gene Kelly just feels like a sleaze.  Of course, I’m completely willing to accept that these subjective feelings of mine aren’t based on any kind of fact.  But, projecting personality is part of an actor’s job.  And, Reynolds and Kelly just seem to be radiating poison to me.

All this being said, I think it’s still worthwhile watching this movie because of its status as a classic.  And, it’s enjoyable enough to watch, I guess.  But, I was kind of annoyed with the whole thing.  But, if you’re not quite as jaded as me, knock yourself out.

Sorry to Bother You - Wild!

Movie: Sorry to Bother You

My Rating: 5 stars

 Now, this movie is something special.  It’s crazy, and insane, and brilliant!  And, just when the story starts spiraling out of control, and you think it couldn’t possibly get any weirder, it goes ahead and blows through your expectations.  I’ll give you a brief description of the story, but really, you should go into this movie knowing as little as possible about it.  It’s way more fun that way.  Cassius Green (Lakeith Stanfield) needs a job, but all he’s been able to find is a crappy telemarketing gig that’s draining his will to live.  When he learns the secret to success in this cut-throat business, he’s granted access behind the scenes, where he learns about all the industry’s shady dealings.  His girlfriend, Detroit (Tessa Thompson), is a subversive street artist, and she’s not so sure she likes the new company-man that Cassius has become.

This movie is wild.  The outrageous story is highlighted with sequences of magical realism, and tons of dark humor—two of my favorite elements in a film.  A lot of it is pretty disturbing, actually.  But, it’s meant to be.  The film takes a pretty serious stance of a couple different, very bleak, social and political issues.  But, the message is delivered with so much humor and horror, that the demoralizing message feels like pure entertainment going down.  This is the kind of movie that will have you exclaiming out loud.  (Really, I’m not sure how anyone seeing this movie in the theater would have been able to concentrate, with all the laughing and yelling it inspires).  I can’t believe that this is the first feature film that Boots Riley has directed, because it’s pretty much perfect—the acting, the effects, the pacing, the humor.  I loved it.  And, so many of the concepts he uses in the story and filmmaking feel brand new.  When’s the last time you were really surprised by a movie?

 I would definitely recommend this film, but cautiously.  The movie gets pretty raunchy, and it will definitely cause some heated arguments if viewed in mixed political company.  It’s not for kids.  It’s not for tea-sipping grannies.  (Whisky swilling grannies, maybe).  But, this movie is so delightfully rebellious that I urge you to find a way to watch it.  All the people I know who saw it before me insisted that I watch it immediately, and then tell them what I thought.  And, I can totally understand that impulse now.  So, go ahead and watch it, and then tell me what you thought.

Bohemian Rhapsody - See it!

Movie: Bohemian Rhapsody

My Rating: 5 stars

 I absolutely loved this movie!  Really, I can’t praise it highly enough.  The story, the music, everything—there wasn’t a dry eye in the house after the movie finished.  I saw it in the theater, and it was a really moving experience.  This movie is, of course, a biopic of Freddie Mercury, and the band he was in, Queen.  I didn’t really know much about Mercury going into the film.  I was familiar with his music, the same as everyone else.  Somehow, Queen’s music has really seeped into the fabric of American culture so deeply that we’re all aware of it whether we know it or not.  And, this movie is full of their songs from start to finish.  They’re woven perfectly into the story—a perfect balance of narrative and song.  And, I was really quite surprised by how many of Queen’s songs I actually knew by heart.  And, I’ve never really thought of myself specifically as a fan of theirs.

 But as I mentioned before, I knew nothing of Freddie Mercury’s life story.  And, this movie starts with him as a rather rebellious college-age kid, living with his very conservative parents.  And, the movie continues on with him pushing boundaries wherever he came up against them—gender roles, sexuality, band politics, record label negotiations, relationships in general.  It looked like a pretty lonely life—and sad.  It broke my heart to watch.  Because, I can relate to the concept of the alienating effect of a strong personality.  Of course, I’d never want to give up that fire behind the eyes to be “normal.”  And, I’m glad Freddie never did either.  It’s a hard life.  It requires a lot of apologizing, hat in hand (literally—Freddie shared my penchant for novelty headwear).  But, all you need is one person in your life who’s willing to smile beatifically at you, and pat you on the head, as you laugh maniacally in their face.  And, then everything will be alright.  Wow!  At some point this post morphed and became alarmingly all about me. :o/  But, so be it!

 I think this movie hit me so hard because all of Queen’s big songs were written from that really emotional place deep inside that makes us cry when we see an ice-skating performance that’s too beautiful.  Anyone else?  Is that just me?  Oh well, you know what I’m talking about.  (If not, is your heart made of stone?)  And, Freddie Mercury’s amazing voice captures that raw emotion in the most visceral way possible.  And everyone else in the theater was weeping alongside me.  (So, I’m not the only weirdo).  You need to see it!  I want to see it again!  Maybe next time at home, so that I can sing along without too much side-eye.  Don’t wait.  I’m sure you’ll love this film too.  In conclusion, I think this exercise has taught us all a little too much about me . . . I’ll show myself out.

Free Solo - A Real White-Knuckle Ride

Movie: Free Solo

My Rating: 5 stars

 Oh man!  I can’t describe this movie without using the word “tense” about a billion times.  This is a seriously nerve-wracking film.  It’s a documentary about rock-climber Alex Honnold, on his mission to free-climb El Capitan in Yosemite Valley.  That’s a 3,200-foot rock wall.  And this crazy kid decided to climb it in one go, without any ropes or protective gear.  It’s a completely insane venture, and even the filmmakers were debating whether it was ethical to be filming (and indirectly encouraging) a man that could fall to his death at any moment.

  I saw this one in the theater last weekend, and it had me literally sweating.  I was on the edge of my seat, and my palms were sweaty the whole time.  I think everyone in the theater was just as tense.  The scariest part of the movie is that all the filmmakers were sweating it too.  If we just saw endeavor from Alex’s point of view, the audience probably wouldn’t be so worried, because that guy is cool as a cucumber.  But, we learn in the film that Honnold’s brain differs from the “typical” brain in that he doesn’t get scared or alarmed by things that others find terrifying.  So, I’m glad we get to see the story unfold from the point of view of Alex’s film crew—a group of his rock-climbing friends.  Because, they are absolutely terrified for him.  They train with him the whole way, but as the day draws closer, they all start to get really nervous.  None of them really wants him to do this climb, but they know they can’t stop him.  And, when he actually does attempt the feat, few of them have the nerve to watch.

The cinematography in this film is absolutely stunning.  A lot of it was filmed by a crew that was climbing the exact same wall that Alex was.  Of course, they’re all tied in with ropes.  But having the camera up there with him really gives the audience a sense of just how high and crazy this climb it.  The camera sweeps down the wall, showing the height.  And, it sweeps up to give a sense of what a marathon the task is.  It pulls out from a close-up shot of Alex physically exerting himself, to an incredibly wide shot so that we can see just how tiny this guy is on the massive wall.  It’s pretty dizzying. 

I do not recommend this movie for anyone who has any issues with heights, or who has delicate nerves.  It feels like a feat just being able to watch this whole movie without having a complete nervous breakdown.  I had to go wash my sticky hands after it was over.  But, the movie is amazing.  Alex Honnold is an anomaly, and people like that are naturally fascinating.  And, this lean, wiry guy is very charming.  And, I guess that’s what makes him so dangerous.  Even his friends liken climbing with his to smoking cigarettes.  It’s bad for them, but they keep coming back.  His recklessness is contagious, and his friends are worried that it may get them killed one day.  But, of course, this makes for a completely compelling documentary subject.  I loved the film, and recommend it to anyone with the constitution for it.

Tomb Raider (2018) - Just Alright

Movie: Tomb Raider

My Rating: 3 stars

 I’m getting a little tired of these movies.  And, by “these movies,” I mean films about really tough, beautiful women, who are good at everything they attempt—martial arts, fist fights, fashion, survival skills, cryptography, killing and dressing elk.  And, Lara Croft is the ultimate bad-ass babe—good at everything, and looking awesome while doing it.  Of course, these stories are always good fun, but they’ve become so clichéd and predictable that it takes a lot of the joy out of it.  But, obviously that didn’t keep me away from this movie.

I guess I just can’t resist these movies, even though they’re becoming less fun for me.  I suppose it’s marketing.  Tomb Raider is a well-known property.  And, there’s definitely a part of me that would love to be a dangerous chick like Lara Croft.  And, I guess the movie studios are counting on consumers like me (and sweaty dudes) to keep this sort of film afloat.  The whole Tomb Raider franchise was definitely due for a quality reboot.  That Angelina Jolie disaster from 2001 was embarrassingly corny.  And, this is definitely an upgrade.  It’s no longer just about Lara’s boobs.  There’s really an attempt to send her on an exciting and mysterious adventure.  The movie’s got beautiful actors, good special effects, great sets, a moderately complex story, and tolerable acting.  But, it still felt a little tired.  I know a reboot is supposed to be a retelling of an old story, but this movie relies on so many old tropes that it feels recycled.

See this movie or don’t.  It’s a lot of mindless fun.  But, it’d be no big loss to miss it.  The story is adventurous.  There are a lot of physical brawls, a lot of ravines to be jumped, lots of guns, and complex ancient puzzles.    And, the actors are charming.  I always like Alicia Vikander.  And, Dominic West is pretty fun.  Walton Goggins is always the perfect, greasy villain.  And, Daniel Wu is pretty hot stuff.  The movie is definitely exciting and action-packed, but it’s still well-worn territory.  I suppose it’s a crowd-pleaser if you have a lot of family over, and people have really mixed taste.  I like to call these “airplane movies.”  So, my advice is that you use it the way these films are intended—as a tool to stave off boredom.

Bonnie & Clyde - Another Quality Film

Movie: Bonnie & Clyde

My Rating: 4 stars

I’ve really been enjoying following along with the Unspooled podcast.  I’ve been watching all these classy films, and feeling really cultured because of it.  Plus, I’ve come to discover that a lot of these snooty, old-timey movies that I assumed would be so boring, are actually pretty great.  And, that’s always a fun surprise.  I’m sure we’re all vaguely aware of what this movie’s about.  This is America’s famous bank-robbing duo.  But, I really only knew about this story by reputation and wasn’t completely sure how the tale would unfold.  Of course, I was familiar with how attractive Warren Beatty and Faye Dunaway looked while playing the parts.  Those are two good-looking people, and their costumes are the absolute coolest.  But, I went into this movie pretty blind. 

I’m not sure what I was expecting from this movie.  I guess I was expecting something about a couple of lovers with terrible home-lives going on bank-robbing, murder spree to fund their fancy habits.  But, almost none of that is true.  These two aren’t lovers.  Well, Bonnie is feeling Clyde’s vibe, but Clyde seems to be absolutely terrified of his partner, and never even wants to be left alone in a room with her.  And in fact, this really isn’t a criminal duo.  Clyde starts adding gang members just as fast as he can just to create a buffer between him and that lusty lass.  First, he adds a random gas-station attendant to the posse.  Then he gets his brother and sister-in-law involved.  And, nothing kills the mood faster than family.  The group seems to be engaging in a life of crime not because they need the cash, but really out of pure boredom (or maybe to impress each other).  I supposed it’s really a cry for attention and strangely, for approval.  The movie was completely different from what I was expecting.  It’s the kind of movie that really gets one contemplating people’s motives and human nature.  And, being a drama, it also makes you a little sad too.

This classic movie is really more about its very flawed protagonists than it is a story about crime.  And, I guess that’s why the story ages so well.  I had a great time getting to know the characters and drooling over their wardrobes.  The story was almost an afterthought.  And honestly, it seems like the action is almost an afterthought for the characters themselves.  But, this is a classic film, and I think it deserves its reputation.  So, I wholeheartedly recommend this movie to a wide audience.

Blockers - Seizing the Night

Movie: Blockers

My Rating: 3 stars

 Every now and then I find myself in the mood to watch a totally ridiculous, raunchy movie.  (Actually, that happens more often than I’d like to admit).  And, in those instances, what could be more perfect than a crude teen sex comedy?  Blockers is about the parents of three high-school girlfriends.  These moms and dads—Leslie Mann, John Cena, and Ike Barinholtz—have become aware of their daughters’ plans to lose their virginity at prom.  And these parents determined to prevent it (hence the title).  These movies are part of a classic genre.  For as long as we’ve had film, there have been storytellers documenting the (mostly vain) efforts of sweaty teens trying to get laid at prom.  It’s a pretty straightforward premise.  But, in my opinion the stories have been getting better over the years.  These comedies are becoming more self-aware, more inclusive, and actually a lot funnier. 

 This genre of movie is now parodying itself, and I appreciate that level of meta commentary.  In the past, this kind of story has typically featured straight, horny boys, trying to trick girls into the backseat of their cars.  Whereas this movie stars girl protagonists who are determined to take charge of their own sexuality.  The script acknowledges that girls have wills of their own, and aren’t just pawns to be hoodwinked.  And, the movie features gay characters too.  These kids are trying to understand these new feelings brought on by their rushing teen hormones, and there are plenty of comedic misunderstandings to be had there.  Also, the jokes are become slightly more sophisticated.  Body parts are no longer the punchlines—or at least not the main punchline.  (One prominent set-piece in this movie does feature John Cena butt-chugging a pitcher of beer).  But, in the 90s, this kind of scene would be like, “isn’t it funny that he’s but-chugging?”  Whereas now, the comedy is more along the lines of, “isn’t it funny that we’re making him butt-chug.”  It’s more about the screenwriters seeing how much fun they can have with the scene where they humiliate the comedic ‘straight-man’.  Ok, maybe these movies aren’t getting too much cleverer.  But, there’s a degree of nuance there.  I don’t know why I’m trying to defend this point.

This is a very funny movie.  You’ll find yourself laughing out loud at jokes, and then be completely embarrassed by what made you do it.  We don’t like to admit it very often, but inside us all is an inner-child who loves a good potty joke.  Of course, the movie is very coarse and raunchy.  It’s not for mixed audiences.  It’s the kind of movie that kids don’t want their parents to know they’re watching, and parents don’t want their kids to know they’ve seen.  But, that’s probably part of the “parents vs. kids” dynamic that is the basis of the whole story.  So, save this one for a time when you know the kids’ll be out of the house for a few hours.  Because, it’s definitely worth your while.

Ben Hur - Lepers!

Movie: Ben Hur

My Rating: 3 stars

 I’ve been going back and watching a bunch of classic movies lately.  It’s because I’ve just started listening to Unspooled, a new podcast that goes through all the movies on the AFI list of top 100 films.  The show hosted by Amy Nicholson and Paul Scheer.  Sheer is one of the guys from the How Did This Get Made podcast, which I also listen to.  I guess he figured he’d punished himself enough with all the terrible movies he had to watch hosting that show, and decided to get himself a little culture.  So, I’ve started watching all these films right along with them.  What I like best about this idea is that these really aren’t films that I would have otherwise selected for myself.  A lot of them look really boring.  (And a few of them are, of course).  But plenty of others are surprisingly delightful.

 This movie, Ben Hur, is one that I ended up liking a lot more than I was expecting to.  I’ve only ever known Charlton Heston as a bit of a punchline.  He’s had some of the sillier and quotable lines of dialogue in cinematic history.  But I had never actually sat through many of his movies.  One of the best parts about this process is that I’m finally getting to see the original source material for a lot of the pop culture references visual tropes that have become a part of our cultural canon.  And, somehow Heston is at the heart of a good amount of these.  In this case, there’s the iconic chariot race scene, and also that image of our hero chained to the oars down in the galley of a slave ship.  I found it super interesting to see.  That’s not to say that I completely enjoyed the task of watching this film.  This movie is incredibly long.  And, the pacing is painfully slow.  I think that’s one of the biggest things that distinguishes new movies from old.  New movies are edited tighter, and move along and a good clip.  Whereas, these old movies drag through scenes, linger on shots, and have a few too many long-winded speeches.  Even that chariot race, this film’s most celebrated and exciting scene, unfolds in real time.  It’s a bit of an ordeal.  I suppose it adds to the sense of fatigue that the characters must be feeling after such a grueling race.

 I think that watching through the AFI list of top 100 movies is a worthwhile exercise.  And accordingly, this is a worthwhile movie to see (and not just because its “important”).  I actually was surprised by how much of this movie I enjoyed.  Of course, you’re not going to want to put on this movie to unwind after a long day.  And, it’s definitely not a film you’re going to want to throw on for the kids with a bowl of popcorn.  It remains a bit of a chore.  So, maybe put it on if you have a lot of laundry to fold.  Or if you want to do a bit of exercise in front of the TV.  Or, watch it in installments.  The film would definitely be a good companion to a repetitive or menial task.  I feel a little bad for qualifying my recommendation so much.  But, I’d rather you see it than not, so feel free to employ any tool necessary to help you get through it.

Isle of Dogs - Quirky, As Expected

Movie: Isle of Dogs

My Rating: 3 stars

 I think I’ll always continue to see any movie that Wes Anderson puts out, regardless of its strengths or weaknesses.  Some of his movies are more compelling than others (to put it diplomatically).  But, even when the content is a bit thinner, I still enjoy Anderson’s aesthetic.  And it this case, I think the film’s visual charms carried the majority of the burden.  This is a story set in Japan on an island to which the city authorities have banished all dogs.  (The pro-cat faction has taken control of the government, and isn’t tolerating any mutts hanging around).  And, one little boy, Atari, has set out on a mission to find and rescue his dog.  Of course, the mission doesn’t go quite as he planned, so the island dogs decide to step in and help him out.

 This is a cute enough premise, but this movie is really more about the elaborate, visual set-pieces than the story.  (This is another Claymation offering, along the lines of Fantastic Mr. Fox).  But, I don’t think the movie’s narrative weakness ruined too much of my enjoyment.  Because that’s not really what drove me to watch this one.  Let’s admit it, we’re all watching these movies for the quirky visuals and appealing retro vibe.  And, in this case, the quirky touch is that the story is told mostly from the point of view of the dogs.  So, the audience can understand what the pups are saying.  But since dogs can’t understand human language, we can’t understand what the people are saying.  Well, I guess you could understand everything if you spoke Japanese.  But since the conceit of the film is that the human characters are always babbling away in the background and don’t really have much bearing on what the dogs are up to, we aren’t given subtitles when the human characters are speaking.  That’s kind of clever.

People didn’t seem to like this movie very much.  It struck some viewers as too experimental.  And, others were offended by the use of Japanese tropes and culture by a white director.  But, I like when directors try new things, and I’m pretty hard to offend.  So, I was on-board for this movie.  It was one I really wanted to see, and I was satisfied with the experience.  And, since anticipating a film too much ahead of time usually ruins it for me, I count this as a success.  So, I recommend this movie for is strangeness and silliness.  However, if you prefer broad comedies and mainstream blockbusters, I’d advise you to skip this one.

Swing Time - Fun (But Awkward)

Movie: Swing Time

My Rating: 3 stars

 Fred Astaire is a delight.  He has such a charming, gaunt, little face.  And, he’s as nimble as a Billy goat.  I guess my love for dance movies extends back into the old-timey sort as well.  I do love choreography.  And that’s definitely why I’m watching these movies.  Because I don’t really care if the local dance troupe saves the neighborhood rec center.  And, these dance movies from the 1930s were similarly light on plot.  Why develop a coherent and compelling narrative when you can solve any conflict or plug any plot hole with an auspiciously timed song and dance number?

So, in this story, Fred Astaire wants to get married.  But, his future father in law isn’t totally sold on the idea of a dancer in a variety show wedding his daughter.  So, Fred’s going to travel to New York for a while to prove his worth by . . . gambling and dancing?  Can that be right?  I mean, I guess it sounds about as plausible as saving the community center through the power of dance, right?  But who cares!  While in New York, Fred meets Ginger Rogers, a lovely dance instructor.  And they fall in love, which puts Fred in an awful pickle.  He’s still planning on taking his gambling winnings back to his fiancé in order to get permission from her father to marry.  But as a dance instructor, Ginger has landed Fred a permanent job dancing at a supper club.  Of course, this leads to a rather unfortunate black-face dance number.  And, that’s a bit awkward if you’re watching this movie in a mixed crowd.  So, perhaps it wouldn’t be a terrible thing for Fred to head back home to live a responsible life in the suburbs.  But once that cringe-inducing dance number is over, the story goes back to the predictable “boy gets the girl” narrative.

All in all, this is a pretty cute movie.  And I do recommend it to casual viewers—insensitive dance numbers aside.  You don’t have to be an aficionado of fine film to appreciate this one.  Because I’ve found that a lot of these movies from the 1930s are actually a lot of fun.  These pre-war movies are usually pretty sexy, and full of exciting night life.  Of course, the movie has got nothing compared to the Thin Man movies, or the Busby Berkely films.  Those will always be the gold standard.  But even I, a person who is typically pretty bored by old-fashioned movies, founds this one to be fun to watch.  So, I say it’s definitely worth checking out.

Black Panther - Pretty Cool

Movie: Black Panther

My Rating: 4 stars

 I liked this movie.  It wasn’t because the story was particularly complex or well-crafted.  The film pretty much follows the format of all these super hero movies we’ve become so familiar with of late.  But, it was really fun to see something different.  This film is yet another super-hero franchise in Marvel’s vast lineup.  And, it really was about time we got a hero that wasn’t a corn-fed white boy.  Not that I don’t enjoy those.  But, we had so many heroes that were so similar that the gimmicks we were using to distinguish one from another were getting pretty contrived.  A lot of it down pretty much came down to cape color.  Of course, I’m being a bit reductive and snarky.  But the point I’m making is that I always like to see a new element come in to mix up a stagnant pool.

 We’ve become accustomed to seeing super hero movies with one token sidekick of color.  And, of course, it was nice when we started seeing that trend start up.  But, it’s really not cutting it any more.  When a story has only one black character, for instance, they’re necessarily written as a pretty broad stereotype.  But when you get to work with a handful different characters, a writer is able to create a much broader range of personalities.  They become individuals rather than symbols.  So, it was very exciting to see the incredible diversity that was possible when every character in this movie was black.  (Except for our token Martin Freeman).  The variety between all the different African tribes that were represented during the multi-nation summit meetings in this film were spectacular.  I wanted to pause the movie so that I could absorb all the little details.  We had good characters, and bad ones; strong ones, and insecure; clever and dopey; beautiful and homely; power-mad and duty bound.  It was quite a palette to play with.  (Plus, I was pretty excited about all the amazing outfits).

 This is a fun movie.  It’s full of crazy action sequences, wild sci-fi technology, acrobatic stunts, amazing costumes, cheesy dialogue—everything you could desire from an action comic.  But, I think it’s also an important movie too.  It’s time to move past the era where the default for every lead in a mainstream blockbuster will be a tall, strapping, European man.  And, this movie provided an excellent start.  This is definitely a movie that everyone can enjoy, and one you won’t want to miss, even if just for the hype.